Nine easy tips to becoming part of the crew.
Genuine friendships don’t happen overnight, so be patient. Concentrate on mastering the role first, and friendships will develop. And be mindful of crossing personal and professional lines too quickly, like adding your co-workers on Facebook on day one. You need to build trust first.
Self-help guru Dale Carnegie once said: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” Whether you’re into self-help gurus or not, he’s on the money.
The best way to get to know someone personally is by engaging with them outside the office. The next time someone in your team says they’re interested in seeing a new film or a band, or eating lunch at a new cafe that’s popped up around the corner, casually suggest you go together.
Avoid eating and watching cat videos on YouTube at your desk during your lunch breaks. You’ll get to know your colleagues a lot more by using the breakout space or staff room, especially those from other departments.
While work topics often fuel much of the chat in breakout areas, try to move discussions away from office topics. Look for shared interests, and if there’s a paper around, try doing the daily quiz as a group.
Getting to know colleagues is easier with the help of a few wines, whether it’s in the office at 4pm on a Friday, monthly works drink at the local, or a specific work function. Just don’t be tempted to get to know your colleagues too well, if you catch our drift. At least not early on, anyway.
Becoming likeable is the first step to friendship. If the photocopier is jammed, offer assistance. If there’s no milk in the fridge, offer to buy some. And if someone is in front of a door holding heavy books, a laptop and a coffee, be the one that opens it for them.
Friendships thrive in positive spaces, so don’t be a downer by complaining about everything, like the weather, or the traffic, or office’s crap coffee. Hold your tongue and be optimistic.
Also, be mindful when engaging over work not to come in as a know-it-all, or overly critical of past processes. Be measured, don’t interrupt others in discussions and be more the observer early on.
We recently published an article called Eleven Unwritten Office Rules To Obey. Read it. Then read again. These stick in on your fridge so you never forget it. While obeying these rules won’t make suddenly make you the hot new person on campus, they will stop you from making unnecessary enemies.
Bring a platter of cookies, cakes or pastries and just watch everyone flock to your desk. Make it a habit, and you’ll get on everyone’s Christmas card list in no time.
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